When I built my first set of wheels I got a cracker deal on rims and hubs - $150 bucks, brand spanking new. To buy the wheels built up locally was $700. I figured as long as I spent less than that I was ahead. So I bought the following...(ebay - about $450 - ahead just)
- park wheel stand - TS2.2
- park tension meter - TM1
- spoke driver (actually bought this for the second set of wheels I bought)
- spoke wrench
+ spokes of course. I watched a couple of videos (DT Swiss is good), Sheldon Brown and started. Was actually reasonably easy, just take your time and learn to understand how the wheel works.
I found the spoke driver a big time saver as it was easy to get all the spokes tightened to the same point without counting turns etc. The tension meter was great to ensure consistent tension through out the wheel. Building a wheel straight is easy, building a wheel with correct tension...much harder. A wheel with correct tension will be much stronger and last longer. For spoke lube I use linseed oil.
I agree you can do it without the wheel stand but if you can afford it money well spent.
Cheers