Oldschool MTB slang

wtr

Likes Dirt
bra: n. the rubber strip placed inside the rim to protect the tube from the nipples.

nipple: n. the nut at the end of a spoke that nobody knows the real name for.

condom: n. the little plastic or rubber thing that protects your tube's valve stem from rim damage.


I now see why bikes and ladies have so many similarities...:p

Hey, don't hate me, it's english alright, it's english!!!:D
 

roasted

Likes Bikes and Dirt
gahahahahaaaa

mandibular disharmony adv.
how one's jaw feels when it and the handle bars attempt to occupy the same space and time.
"Fuck!" "Pray, whats wrong?" "I've got mandibular disharmony."


organ donor n.
someone who rides without a helmet.


WOMBATS n.
"WOmen's Mountain Biking And Tea Society", a Marin-based organization founded by writer and former MTB racer Jacquie Phelan.
 

bradh

Likes Bikes and Dirt
The Dictionary of Mountain Bike Slang said:
auger v. to involuntarily take samples of the local geology, usually with one's face, during a crash. See face plant.
heh heh. now, where's my copy of tread?

(if you're old enough to remember tread, then, well, you must be damn old—like me. btw, who else thinks that greg herbold is the most annoying motherfucker in the history of mountain biking? maybe i should start a poll...)
 

Rik

logged out
bradh said:
heh heh. now, where's my copy of tread?
I dunno about your copy, but I bought Tread and 10 years of Kamikaze off ebay for <$20 the other week :cool:
Mmm... oldschool goodness.
 

Caine

Likes Dirt
crotch-testing n. sudden impact between a male rider's private parts and something very hard and pointy, such as a handlebar stem or seat.

flying trapeze n. when you endo into a clotheslin

POS n. Piece Of Shit. The antithesis to real bicycles, typified by Huffy, Murray, and any of a number of other bicycles that are poorly designed, manufactured, and assembled.

WOMBATS n. "WOmen's Mountain Biking And Tea Society", a Marin-based organization founded by writer and former MTB racer Jacquie Phelan.

This stuff is GOLD :D :D
 

Rexy

Likes Bikes and Dirt
Ah ive seen this before, a while ago myself and X13 had a good laugh with it.
It is amazing how every time you read it you seem to find something you previously missed that will get a giggle!
 

bradh

Likes Bikes and Dirt
Rik said:
I dunno about your copy, but I bought Tread and 10 years of Kamikaze off ebay for <$20 the other week :cool:
Mmm... oldschool goodness.
damn you... :mad: :D mine's a genuinely pirated copy, dubbed from a bike store copy back when mtb vids were as rare as hens' you-know-whats.

did you ever see re-tread? the original was actually pretty boring, but was worth the effort because it was so unique in its day; the sequel was just plain shite. it was pretty much just a re-hash of the first, thus it paled in the face of its contemporaries—i.e. by the time re-tread was released, movies like hammer time were around, and in spite of the considerable sentimental value of seeing hans rey and h-ball back together for a reprise of the original, it just didn't cut it, unfortunately.

a bit off-topic, and possibly deserving of thread all its own, but, imo, a genealogy of important mtb flicks would look something like this: tread, hammer time, chain smoke, kranked1, maybe nwd1, probably earthed in here somewhere (just cos it's so shit hot), and the collective...
 

Numinos

Likes Dirt
bacon n. scabs on a rider's knees, elbows, or other body parts.

Seems so familiar just never heard it this way
 

reax

Likes Bikes
beartrap 1) v. to slip off a pedal, causing it to slam one in the shin, when one gets kracked with a pedal. 2) n. the toothlike scars resulting from being beartrapped.


I still have the scar across my shin from being beartrapped. Didn't even realise until after we finished the ride and we washed the mud off bikes and ourselves. Right to the bone and 6 stitches.
 

Hopper

Likes Dirt
male blindness n. when a male rider watches a beautiful female ride over rough terrain and stares intensely at all the jiggling parts, making him too dizzy to see straight when it's his turn to ride the same terrain.

wang chung n. what you might get when your stem has no nard guard.
 
Top