Relativity of looks syndrome.

[jacko13]

Been pondering something for a little while, and thought i'd bring it to RB for you guys to give some ideas.

Wondering, are our looks relative to who we find attractive?

E.G.
Using a 1-10 scale.
A '5' girl is dating a '5' boy, she thinks he's quite the looker.
But '9' girl doesnt think he's attractive. Is this because she is better looking than the '5' girl, therefore being relative to her own attractiveness, or because she knows she can do 'better'.

Of course there is personal preference, and different styles and fashions that people find more attractive, but think very generally. This of course is coming from a shallow minded person who relys on looks only, so lets not get into personality.

Ill add more if i think of it.

Not a syndrome as such either

 

[indica]

the other question would be - do looks have a lot to do with attractiveness? Personality has a big bearing I would think.
9 girl probably has no brain and no personality and has come to believe - by reading those magazines that cater for the shallow, idiotic fashion whores - that she needs a bronzed boy with abs and hair brushed across his face that wears more foundation than she does.
9 girl can piss off, 5 to 7 is where it is at.

 

[NCR600]

Your theory is flawed. People almost always think they are better looking than they actually are. The way self esteem is taught by people like semi qualified school counsellors, shrinks, and Oprah friggin' Winfrey, being realistic about your looks, intelligence and abilities is considered to be low self esteem and needs to be treated with copious quantities of Zoloft.

It's quite simple to disprove your theory by browsing the profiles on any dating website. in 10 minutes you can find any number of short, dumpy, overweight girls looking for 6' plus PhD educated, ambitious, athletic guys , and an almost equal number of balding, fat 40 year old men who look like they've been dressed by their mothers looking for slim, blonde 25 year old women. With big knockers.

 

[MasterOfReality]

the other question would be - do looks have a lot to do with attractiveness? Personality has a big bearing I would think.
9 girl probably has no brain and no personality and has come to believe - by reading those magazines that cater for the shallow, idiotic fashion whores - that she needs a bronzed boy with abs and hair brushed across his face that wears more foundation than she does.
9 girl can piss off, 5 to 7 is where it is at.

This.

When I met my fiance, I was attracted to her by looks but not in a huge way. It was her personality that was the hook. The more I got to know her, the more I liked what I saw.

 

[Norco Maniac]

and an almost equal number of balding, fat 40 year old men who look like they've been dressed by their mothers looking for slim, blonde 25 year old women. With big knockers.

it may be an age thing, but i've found the guys my age want a woman whose good looks are inversely proportional to their own...ie: the the less attractive they are, the more attractive (and young) they expect their women to be.

 

[jacko13]

the other question would be - do looks have a lot to do with attractiveness? Personality has a big bearing I would think.
9 girl probably has no brain and no personality and has come to believe - by reading those magazines that cater for the shallow, idiotic fashion whores - that she needs a bronzed boy with abs and hair brushed across his face that wears more foundation than she does.
9 girl can piss off, 5 to 7 is where it is at.

This.

When I met my fiance, I was attracted to her by looks but not in a huge way. It was her personality that was the hook. The more I got to know her, the more I liked what I saw.

I agree with both of you, and would assume personality plays a bigger part than looks in over all attractiveness.

But, i was more curious that if personality was not in the equation, would 10's be with 10's, and 5's with 5's, or similar numbers, because they "can't do better" or "can do better"

A mate said to me the other day, people in the 8-10 range often know they're good looking, and so wont even bother with people of a 'lower' standard, because the magazines and media give the idea that its wrong to.

Really, i suppose i get frustrated with people thinking others aren't good enough, simply based on their looks. (Not saying im entirely exempt from that statement either)

 

[gerg]

Its meant to be a bit of a laugh but there are some very interesting points.

http://www.laddertheory.com/

 

[dog boy]

Do watch how I met your mother? .... Cause if you did you would know there is a Reacher and a settler.

 

[Mobywan]

Do watch how I met your mother? .... Cause if you did you would know there is a Reacher and a settler.

Please explain ^^

Good topic btw, some interesting theories already.

Remember reading something years ago that showed that people tend to 'develop better looks' if they associate with good looking people, ie. Jaw lines, cheekbones develop in more attractive ways... fkd if I know how that works. Hasn't worked for me.

 

[Elbo]

I just watched that episode of How I Met Your Mother the other day. I love that show

The theory proposed was that in every relationship there is a 'reacher' and a 'settler.' The reacher achieves above their 'league' in attracting their partner. They would be known to say things like "I'm so lucky to have you," their friends would say "s/he's out of your league," etc. The settler settles for someone from a lower level (i.e. a reacher.) The settler is quietly content in the relationship, but they are aware that they are the settler.

 

[scblack]

Remember reading something years ago that showed that people tend to 'develop better looks' if they associate with good looking people, ie. Jaw lines, cheekbones develop in more attractive ways... fkd if I know how that works.

I'll believe that - I've noticed the people around do eventually start to look better.

 

[Fruitbat]

I'll believe that - I've noticed the people around do eventually start to look better.

Especially when it's Friday afternoon and you are down the local having an after work bevvy....

 

[rabatt]

I'll believe that - I've noticed the people around do eventually start to look better.

Funniest thing iv read all day thanks

On topic, intelligent people have intelligent friends, who generally eat healthier ad live healthier lifestyles which generally makes them better looking... That's my theory

Not so much that ugly people arent attracted to good looking people, just good-looking people don't usually find ugly people attractive...

I guess that was just rehashing the settler and reacher theory


I am always amazed at how good-looking most of my group of freinds are! Haha

 

[niftydog]

...a '5' boy... But '9' girl doesnt think he's attractive.

It is relative, but only because the '9' girl subconsciously knows she has the ability (looks) to catch a '9' boy so she intuitively ignores all the '5' boys... unless they sit funny because of the fatness of their wallets.

How you'd create such a scale is beyond me - a lot of what the media say are "beautiful people" look frighteningly horrible to me. Angelina Jolie, Miranda Kerr, Megan Fox, Kim Kardashian etc... all f'n swamp monsters!

 

[Joy]

Angelina Jolie, Miranda Kerr, Megan Fox, Kim Kardashian etc... all f'n swamp monsters!

um, wot?.....

 

[Rider_of_Fast]

um, wot?.....

Yeah I know, strange personal preference huh

 

[TheBofh]

In my teens & twenties I was attracted to the obviously good looking females but as I age disgracefully I find myself attracted to particular features such as a nice smile or eyes, a pleasant personality. I have been with very attractive people that weren't nice & unconventionally attractive people that were awesome but it all comes down to compatibility & chemistry in the long run.

 

[Hamsta]

It is relative, but only because the '9' girl subconsciously knows she has the ability (looks) to catch a '9' boy so she intuitively ignores all the '5' boys... unless they sit funny because of the fatness of their wallets.

How you'd create such a scale is beyond me - a lot of what the media say are "beautiful people" look frighteningly horrible to me. Angelina Jolie, Miranda Kerr, Megan Fox, Kim Kardashian etc... all f'n swamp monsters!

Agreed Dog who is Nifty. I think that there are way, way more beautiful women around than what the media dictates as 'beautiful'. A damn good sense of humour is very appealling imho, as is intelligence, integrity and independence. Seriously, why does the media make heros out of zeros?.

What is it exactly that these 'beautiful' people actually done that doesn't smack of a contrived media stunt?

What is more alarming imho is how supposedly intellegent people become caught up in the hype. I guess I don't like what these type of media created puppets represent in the big scheme of things, regardless of their looks.

Bomb Hollywood

 

[Joy]

Agreed Dog who is Nifty. I think that there are way, way more beautiful women around than what the media dictates as 'beautiful'. A damn good sense of humour is very appealling imho, as is intelligence, integrity and independence. Seriously, why does the media make heros out of zeros?.

What is it exactly that these 'beautiful' people actually done that doesn't smack of a contrived media stunt?

What is more alarming imho is how supposedly intellegent people become caught up in the hype. I guess I don't like what these type of media created puppets represent in the big scheme of things, regardless of their looks.

Bomb Hollywood

I agree in some respects. Hollywood has a way of turning a 5/6 girl into an 8/9 girl.
BUT
I think you're just desensitized to it all. You see so many good looking girls on tv all the time that it warps your point of view. I reckon if you saw any of those women mentioned before out walking around in everyday life, you'd be like WOW. Swamp monsters? Jesus christ mate I'd love to see the girls you hang out with!

Why should a good looking woman suddenly be criticised by you just because they became famous? Do you know them personally? How do you know they don't display all the characteristics you listed above?

 

[hach_bee]

All very good points.

But what about some of your '9 girls' who genuinely don't think that they themselves are attractive? I've seem some gorgeous girls who are absolutely oblivious to their attractiveness...