Advice for mate with cheating girlfreind?

[FR Drew]

Farley, are you the only person on planet earth whose judgement doesn't go to shit when you're smashed? I'm happy for you but I don't think you can impose your lofty standard of extreme ethanol proof self control on the rest of the planet.

The point has been made that they were going through a rough patch. As far as I know, rough patches are the bits that make you think "do i really want to be in this relationship?" and "might someone else be better for me?" These are a really bad time to be out sinking brews with the opposite sex as you don't have the restraint not to act on the initial impulse. To say "If she really loved him she wouldn't have cheated" is a blanket statement but, in my opinion at least, an utter load of crap.

If these folks stay together, they've got a rought road ahead. Dented trust is a killer. No matter how long you keep your nose clean there's always that little niggle in the mind of the other person of if they can trust you.

As for Fat_Ride's theory, if that's the attitude then give up now. One betrayal can never be cancelled out by another from the other partner. You eiother say that you're going to stay, wipe the slate and put it behind you as best you can or you accept that the whole situation is farked and get out. You can't have it both ways, you can't keep a grudge for years and you can't stack a retaliatory shag in the cupboard for whenever in the future you feel you might want to get back at someone.

I'm living with a screwup I made with a fiancee 8 years ago (we've been married 6 years) while i was clinically depressed. Ended up on medication for 6 months and got my shit back together, but not till I'd bolloxed my uni studies, bolloxed my relationship, bolloxed half my friendships. If there was one thing in my entire life I could undo, that one betrayal would be it. It's always hanging over me and i know that even though I was farked up at the time, i'll never have 100% trust from the woman I love, there's always going to be that little seed of doubt. "Why couldn't it happen again?"

If these folks get it together, their road aint gonna be smooth.

Drew

 

[Superman]

best post so far has to be Grip's

sorry no skiddys, but this isnt the jerry springer show, its farkin, a mountain bike forum.

 

[FuTAnT]

Floody wrote:

hence my abnormal lack of tolerance for americans

Sorry Floody, but what's abnormal about that? Sounds pretty standard to me! :wink:

More that I'd like to beat the particular serviceman to death and bury him in a shallow grave with a bag of lime. But not without putting him through a good few days of excruciating pain.
OT, sorry.

From reading a book about Forensic Anthropolgy don't bother buring a body. Just cut it up into as many pieces as possible, spread it around the place and let nature/dogs/animals do their work. It's a real bitch when they can't find it all.

No, I'm not morbid, it's just what it says in the book!

 

[McBain]

A mates just found out that his girlfreind had slept with some other guy.

Get him to piss in her shoes - it is only fair.

 

[Anonymous]

http://www.illwillpress.com/vault.html

 

[naz]

kill the slut

there is no justifaction for cheating.

 

[GrubNut]

kill the slut

there is no justifaction for cheating.

oh nice. My sarcasm meter is pointing to "indeterminate".

 

[toodles]

there is no justifaction for cheating.

Amen to that. Dunno about the killing though. Maybe just a severe wounding.

Seriously, they're stuffed now. If she's done it, and he knows they'll never be the same again.

 

[naz]

kill the slut

there is no justifaction for cheating.

oh nice. My sarcasm meter is pointing to "indeterminate".

so if ur gf was cheating on you, youd be all cool wit it, love is bullshit, they cant use that as a excuse coz if they really loved u they wouldnt do it, alcohol/drugs.....fuck them off quicker "oh i was drunk i didnt know what was going on" ye sure

 

[GrubNut]

kill the slut

there is no justifaction for cheating.

oh nice. My sarcasm meter is pointing to "indeterminate".

so if ur gf was cheating on you, youd be all cool wit it, love is bullshit, they cant use that as a excuse coz if they really loved u they wouldnt do it, alcohol/drugs.....fuck them off quicker "oh i was drunk i didnt know what was going on" ye sure

No, mate, I would most certainly NOT be "all cool with it".

My inclination would probably be to show my new EXpartner the door. I would not however "kill the slut" (or resort to the physical/verbal/emotional violence that you seem to endorse by this statement).

 

[naz]

kill the slut

there is no justifaction for cheating.

oh nice. My sarcasm meter is pointing to "indeterminate".

so if ur gf was cheating on you, youd be all cool wit it, love is bullshit, they cant use that as a excuse coz if they really loved u they wouldnt do it, alcohol/drugs.....fuck them off quicker "oh i was drunk i didnt know what was going on" ye sure

No, mate, I would most certainly NOT be "all cool with it".

My inclination would probably be to show my new EXpartner the door. I would not however "kill the slut" (or resort to the physical/verbal/emotional violence that you seem to endorse by this statement).

figure of speech

 

[M PWR]

I really don't see the problem here if a girl has cheated on him that the perfect reason to get another girl.

G/f's come and go, they are kinda like mountain bikes, when they start playing up on you, costing you too much, becoming a big hassle, start looking really raggy, then it's time for a brand new shiny girlfriend.

They cheat because they, aren't happy with him, aren't getting it right or want a bigger one. All things that you can't fix because you garrenteed to be out riding with your mates.

-Sean

 

[Jordy]

They cheat because they, aren't happy with him, aren't getting it right or want a bigger one.

-Sean

or they are just general sluts, like half of the female population

 

[M PWR]

or they are just general sluts, like half of the female population

You are very wise.

-Sean

 

[Jordy]

or they are just general sluts, like half of the female population

You are very wise.

-Sean

Thank you, its probably more then half though

 

[josh]

Id tell him not to take anyone's advice off an internet forum.

Except maybe Naz's..."Kill the slut".

 

[steamfrog]

Do what i did

Ring here up then chuck all her shit on the street and let her go live with her new man. Thats what i did.. very childish but it helped with the hurt that was turning into anger but after that i felt great, later i found out she cheated on him so Belinda your just one big slut bucket.

Dood take heart that what goes around comes around, someone she likes will do the same to her. (fingers crossed)

Then again i was ALOT younger so i went and spray painted SLUT on her car in red spray paint (yes i know it was VERY immature but anger/hurt does strange things). but we were seeing each other for 5 years.. To this day i hear stories of guys sge rooted behind my back and im talking over 10.

One more thing the guy she was rooting used to drive past me in his V8 when i was in my mini and smirk and give me the finger and stuff,(i used to floor the minin but could never catch him) this drove me absolutly nutso, so one day when dooshbag happened to be filling up at the servo i spotted him did a U turn dorve up behind him got out and said "hello, remember me" then i grabbed him by his mullet and bashed his forhead into the bonnet of my mini, gave him a hiding and left. Im not saying that this is cool or a good idea but oh man it made me feel better. He then got a restraining order and a lump on his head that never went away.

PS.. ive mellowed now and im not violent at all.

 

[toodles]

Re: Do what i did

but oh man it made me feel better

and that's all that really matters...

 

[crozza]

Obviously she was not happy so she fucked up and that’s it. Id ditch her because there is no excuse for cheating. Its bullshit knowing that the person you’re with has been with another bloke while you stayed true. Even though it’s not mine to say, drop her and move on.

 

[Scully]

Farley, are you the only person on planet earth whose judgement doesn't go to shit when you're smashed? I'm happy for you but I don't think you can impose your lofty standard of extreme ethanol proof self control on the rest of the planet.

My judgment goes pretty bad when im smashed but every time i am still able to make important choices like that. anyone who blames it on the alcohol is weak and using it as a cop out. as far as i am concerned i can be smashed as all hell and still make the decision not to sleep with someone cause i can picture the consequences. id say this goes for most of us as well.