Asininedrivel
caviar connoisseur
Reminds me of a tale of relatively harmless idiocy I may have committed coming home from a NYE party about 13 years ago. I'd ridden my pub bike there and wasMy bike knows the way home.
Mate: you probably shouldn't you're hammered
Me: namfine
Mate: You're really not
Me: nahikan doitwatch
I proceeded to get on the bike, at which point I completely forgot what to do, was like drunkeness had wiped any memory of how bikes work. I sort of turned the bars, at which point the bike wobbled and steered straight into a gutter. Then I fell over. My mate almost fell over too from laughing so hard.
Bike's fault. It did not know the way home.