Little Things You Love

boyracer said:
Riding to the office Xmas party... and listen to all the tards ' oh, i better only have one more, i'm driving".
My bike knows the way home.
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Danger! Danger! This has long been my line of thinking, but at work yesterday we were all laughing about last year's Christmas party and preparing for this year's...

Last year I got absolutely destroyed. It is a lengthy and hilarious story, but it does include me crashing my bike (harmlessly) on the ride home (flat shared path). This crash left a tiny nick on my fork stanchion and a bit of a rash along the leg. Best I can figure is u either rode into or attempted to ride along a small brick retaining wall at one of the new apartment blocks. There is no other obstacle along that route that I can identify and lay blame on.

This year I am planning to be dropped off and then walk home. But also not get quite as messed up, but...we all know what happens when one says such a thing.
 
pink poodle said:
Danger! Danger! This has long been my line of thinking, but at work yesterday we were all laughing about last year's Christmas party and preparing for this year's...

Last year I got absolutely destroyed. It is a lengthy and hilarious story, but it does include me crashing my bike (harmlessly) on the ride home (flat shared path). This crash left a tiny nick on my fork stanchion and a bit of a rash along the leg. Best I can figure is u either rode into or attempted to ride along a small brick retaining wall at one of the new apartment blocks. There is no other obstacle along that route that I can identify and lay blame on.

This year I am planning to be dropped off and then walk home. But also not get quite as messed up, but...we all know what happens when one says such a thing.
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rookie.
And shame on you for walking. What's next triathalon?
 
boyracer said:
My bike knows the way home.
Click to expand...
Reminds me of a tale of relatively harmless idiocy I may have committed coming home from a NYE party about 13 years ago. I'd ridden my pub bike there and was stumbling walking it home along with a mate. I decided walking was boring and that I was going to ride.
Mate: you probably shouldn't you're hammered
Me: namfine
Mate: You're really not
Me: nahikan doitwatch
I proceeded to get on the bike, at which point I completely forgot what to do, was like drunkeness had wiped any memory of how bikes work. I sort of turned the bars, at which point the bike wobbled and steered straight into a gutter. Then I fell over. My mate almost fell over too from laughing so hard.
Bike's fault. It did not know the way home.
 
Labcanary said:
It's ok, guys. I was mad at the time but I made the flight and now I can just laugh about the stupidity of a heard of sheeple 😂
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Anyway, we're in the wrong thread for all this negativity.

LTIL: the smile on a kid's face yesterday when he collected his newly built up MTB. This kid lives in Creswick so he will have his pick of trails to hone his skills on. Awesome.
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Labcanary - here's a pro-tip on how to clear that aisle quick-sticks.

Stand up, grab your bag, Start pretending to feel ill, and announce loudly that "I'm going to be sick!!!" Make sure you dry-heave a few seconds apart for emphasis.
Watch those selfish Bastids suddenly scatter like cockroaches :D
Stumble/jog down that aisle and off that plane.
If you find a convenient bin, you could do a big ol' dry heave for show on/in that bin,
or just keep on moving to your connecting flight.
Perfection. :cool:
 
Asininedrivel said:
Reminds me of a tale of relatively harmless idiocy I may have committed coming home from a NYE party about 13 years ago. I'd ridden my pub bike there and was stumbling walking it home along with a mate. I decided walking was boring and that I was going to ride.
Mate: you probably shouldn't you're hammered
Me: namfine
Mate: You're really not
Me: nahikan doitwatch
I proceeded to get on the bike, at which point I completely forgot what to do, was like drunkeness had wiped any memory of how bikes work. I sort of turned the bars, at which point the bike wobbled and steered straight into a gutter. Then I fell over. My mate almost fell over too from laughing so hard.
Bike's fault. It did not know the way home.
Click to expand...
I tried drunkenly negotiating with my bike to take me home from a Bathurst hotel in my youth. Crashed before I even got out of the pub carpark. Re-entered negotiations and proceeded to wobble up the street. Came to sometime later tangled up underneath the bike in the middle of the first roundabout. Decided the bike was too drunk to ride so I walked it from there...
 
silentbutdeadly said:
I tried drunkenly negotiating with my bike to take me home from a Bathurst hotel in my youth. Crashed before I even got out of the pub carpark. Re-entered negotiations and proceeded to wobble up the street. Came to sometime later tangled up underneath the bike in the middle of the first roundabout. Decided the bike was too drunk to ride so I walked it from there...
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Many years ago when young and single I lived within easy walking distance of our local. A workmate lived about halfway between me and the pub. For context I could see his flat from my loungeroom and you could see the pub from his back stairs. Our receptionist lived about the same distance but in the opposite direction. We could never work out why it took 10 minutes to walk to the pub but sometimes hours to get home. On one occasion both colleagues decided I was too drunk to make the trip home on my own so they escorted me to my door. Then I had to help them get to the nearby flat and once there, because we were gentlemen, we escorted the young lady home. Next morning her mother woke us from our slumber on the loungeroom floor to serve us coffee. Our snoring had woken the dog which woke the parents. We then walked home to find both flats wide open from the night before. Apparently we could open doors but not close them. Apparently we left the pub at 23:00 and arrived at the resting place at 04:20. A sober distance of 2.1km all up. Apparently the theory of relativity was proven that night.
 
oldcorollas said:
on the upside, your bag is always at the carousel before you've made it off the plane :)
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Except when it's not.

First trip to Derby with the foxies some speed racer had taken off with my macpac, while their (clearly different) macpac was left spinning on the carousel. Airport staff told me to take their pack, and someone will do the exchange when they manage to get in touch with the recalcitrant numpty!?!?

We had the shuttle van and trailer already loading up, so I did the same, and off we went to Derby.

A couple of hours after settling in Derby, I get the call 'we've made contact with the people who have your pack. They are here now. Can you come back to the airport to exchange packs?'

Nope, you can deliver it here to Derby. Thanks.

And they did. It would have been very late by the time numpty got their pack back. Glad I took it, or no doubt they would have reneged on their delivery offer, and just told me it's at the airport ready for you to collect.
 
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