So i blew $1k to get the missus riding and she is useless.

nathanm

Likes Bikes and Dirt
Firstly this is me venting so feel free to roast mercilessly as it's all my fault.

So the missus wants to get into riding with me as she has worse separation anxiety than my dog.

We do a flat ride and she sits down and cries after 5ks as shes exhausted and her ass hurts.

Follow up with a skills park session and she goes ok but she keeps getting bounced around on the hardtail.

With thanks to Moorey I upgraded the missus bike to a neat little anthem with new frame, shock, bars etc for around $600.

Then I drop another couple of hundred on kit.

Thinking this bike is prime and will turn her into Tracey Hannah we do a mt wellington run

Starts off ok, will only pedal in granny gear at 4kmh but that ok. She's rolling over rocks and roots no drama.

When then hit a fast downish fireroad with table drains and she loves it and all is sweet.

Then we get into some tight teccie single trail and it all goes to shit.

First little roller, grabs the front brake, gets tangled in the bars and eats shit hard.

I just look and realise this is about to go to custard. Laying trapped under the bike she's begging me to untangle her, then gets up shaking and crying.

Off we go again, I'm yelling to balance the pedals but nope, right foot down, pedal strike. She literally starfishes taking feet and hands off and goes down, at least softer this time.

Gets back on smashes some more pedals but goes ok, but walks anything not flat.

Open fireroad again and she decides it's too scary, grabs front brake and starfishes but stays on God knows how.

Now she's too scared to even fucking ride any gradient that isn't flat.

Fml we walk a few kays out, I absolutely lose my shit major argument ensues.

I want to sell the bike and get on tinder. She loves it and wants to go again tomorrow.

How do I tell her she's a danger to herself and shouldnt be allowed on anything without training wheels?
 

moorey

Pagophagic
:eek:
Just do what I do. Pretend you want her to ride, and buy her fancy stuff that I know she doesn’t really want...so the kids or I get it.

In regards to your woman, if you want her to ride, get her a couple of hours of professional coaching. She won’t listen to you
 

foxpuppet

Eats Squid
:eek:
Just do what I do. Pretend you want her to ride, and buy her fancy stuff that I know she doesn’t really want...so the kids or I get it.

In regards to your woman, if you want her to ride, get her a couple of hours of professional coaching. She won’t listen to you
Moorey is spot on, even if you are some kind of pro coach, some significant others just will not listen to partners instructing them. Send them off alone or for some coaching.

Think about yourself.... did you ave someone telling you what or how to do it when you started?


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Halo1

Likes Dirt
Are you riding trails at her skill level or yours?

I think you just need to relax and let her find her own comfort level on the bike. if that is a 3k ride when you were hoping for 10k then so be it.

I spent about $3k on bikes for the wife and kids that get a yearly ride at best. The bike are always there and I am always keen for a ride in they are.
 

clockworked

Like an orange
You in hobart? Send her riding with my missus. She's always looking for a riding buddy and (some) women are 1. Way less nervous riding with each other and 2. Way more encouraging to each other
 

mark22

Likes Dirt
Patience patience and super easy trails this could mean lots wide flat trails. Build skills first eg changing gears, braking, body position, cornering, BEFORE any proper single track. If you lack the commitment and patience to be a good teacher go for what Morrey says and use a coach.
 

Scotty675

Likes Dirt
To much to soon I recon. Not sure were you went on the mountain, but even north south would have a total newbie pushing in a couple of rock sections.
Maybe load up the bikes and drive up to the tca grounds and do a couple of laps of the domain loop (won’t test you, but she will get some confidence up and general skills).
Maybe a ride pipeline(ferntree) or shag bay (gielston bay) other starter tracks at gielston bay if you don’t mind a pedal.
I no the first time I took the Mrs for a ride I thought lindisfare to Howrah would be a good easy ride (I was wrong and ended up riding back to the car to go pick her up).
 

rockmoose

Likes Dirt
^^^^^^^ what they all said.

Perhaps find some tarmac bike trails with nice scenery, to build strength and condition, and get used to being on the bike.

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creaky

The obviative
Get her involved in a shop ride with some women that involves coffee/food.

It is frustrating riding with someone who is a number of levels below you in terms of fitness and/or skills. If she hasn’t been riding at all for a long time then really the best place to start gaining confidence is on paths/quiet roads. In the deep end doesn’t work when she has a spouse there to complain to.
 

danncam

Likes Dirt
I bought my wife a second hand anthem once, only got used a couple of times. Then tried to take my youngest daughter on a ride at lysterfield to help her in her great Vic bike ride training. She grabbed fistful of brake a few minutes in, OTB, and fractured her T10.
Take it slow and be patient.
 

Haakon

veni, vidi, volanti
I got her a Giant Boulder back in about 1998, and we were regularly riding all the way into the city from Ringwood for a while and getting the train back. Then I decided to step it up slowly and tried some light singletrack out the back of Jells Park. Didn’t warn her properly of a crest and sharp downward turn - she panicked, and went OTB onto the edge of a bridge thing and I was amazed she didn’t break a shoulder...

Took me 15 years to get her back on a mountain bike....

Take it slow, assume nothing. And yes, get her lessons from someone else!
 
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fatboyonabike

Eats Squid
tell her that $1000 bucks isn't really enough to be spending on a real trail bike anyway, you thought you would be able to get it to something close for that money, and you really tried, but to be honest you need to be spending upwards of 3 to 5K...scare her off ;)
sell the bike and buy her a premium gym membership package that has a spin class 5 nights a week, buy her a lorna jane voucher
you get your riding back, resume normal transmission...
I did this a few years ago, but with motorbikes...cost way more in the end, as she insisted on a new bike, didn't want some old clapped out 2nd hander to learn on,
dropped it heaps out the bush, dropped it at an intersection whilst practicing for her P plates, that was the final straw for her!
good luck, you have some thinking to do..invest the time and energy, or discourage and reassure!
 

Halo1

Likes Dirt
The other option is for you to give up MTB all together, sell the bikes super cheap and join her in what she likes to do. Post up some bargains for the rest of us to grab :p couples who stick together stay together ;)
 

SF Trailboy

Likes Bikes and Dirt
Find a section of non technical single track and just do 3 km loops of it. Then expand and change gradually as she masters it. Yep boring for you but it will work.
 

Labcanary

Likes Dirt
As others have said, skills clinic or coaching. Preferably in an all women setting so she feels more comfortable. Start small, let her develop her fitness and saddle comfort.
Get her watching some mtb skills videos with you and even just general riding videos to get an idea of body position, etc.

And good luck!
I finally got my husband riding mtb and we get to ride as a family with our kid on a Dolittle seat.
 

Plankosaurus

Hydraulic Jack specialist
...She won’t listen to you
Word.

It took me 5 years to get wifey actually keen to ride. She went out with me for gravel rides and a little bit of easy single-track, but it was always chock full of complaints about the bike, the weather, the trails, her fitness. I bought and upgraded and bought some more but it was always the same thing.

Till she went on some ladies rides.

She had people she could relate to
People to talk lady talk with
People with less skills to make her feel better
People with more skills to try and keep up with
And most importantly, she didn't stress out or get angry at advice coming from the other ladies.
(Cupcakes and coffee and chinwagging after the ride were a big part of the experience apparently too.)


Those ladies rides give her something I cant. And she still rides different with them than she does with me, she's had a good think about that now and reckons it's got a lot to do with the perceived skill/fitness levels.

And skills clinics, she loves those too. I can talk her through something all day long but I'm her hubby, not a trained professional. It goes against every fibre of her being to listen to advice from me, regardless of how right I am. I'd hazard a guess this is a common trait given my conversations with other fellas.

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