Here's an extract from the Wiki that I tailored to suit the forums; Re: Alan Jones.I am actually (seriously) wondering if Alan Jones is starting to be suffering from something that's affecting his ability to remember details, put together sentences - Particularly in the last four months or so the number of strange mistakes I've noticed him make - wrong names, being completely lost for words - it really is becoming hard to not notice. I can't be sure whether he would always make occasional mistakes in the past, and because it was just occasional I wouldn't notice them, but lately it's a small handful every race weekend.
Born sometime a fair while ago, he did stuff and won a world championship in Formula One with Williams. All the tracks have changed since then and all the fun bits have been taken out and aren't much fun now. Since winning the title he's used his fame and riches to court tons of hookers, smoke cheap ciggies and drink heaps of piss. He's got some dirt on a couple of television broadcast companies and has made them allow him to be a guest presenter on race broadcasts for some unknown fucking reason. His recent years of self indulgence from his hefty pay for expert opinions has cooked whatever was left in his brain and his memory is shot. He drinks beer at 6am, thinks Herman Tilke is a school teacher and cannot fit in a race car of any sort.