Jokes Thread.

What do anal sex and broccoli have in comments?

If you were forced to have either as a child your probably not going to like it as an adult either.

Sent from my HTC Desire using Tapatalk 2
 
I took the wife to a club at the weekend. There was a guy on the
dance floor giving it everything he had; breakdancing, moonwalking, back
flips, the works.
My wife turned to me and said, " See that guy? 25 years ago he proposed to
me and I turned him down."
I said, "Looks like he's still fucking celebrating!!"
 
Some members of the collingwood cheersquad have just returned from a trip to an orphanage in war ravaged Mozambique. "It was a great opportunity to meet so many underprivileged people with very little chance in their lives" said Sonali Mgumba aged 7
 
thecat said:
I took the wife to a club at the weekend. There was a guy on the
dance floor giving it everything he had; breakdancing, moonwalking, back
flips, the works.
My wife turned to me and said, " See that guy? 25 years ago he proposed to
me and I turned him down."
I said, "Looks like he's still fucking celebrating!!"
Click to expand...

dunndog said:
Some members of the collingwood cheersquad have just returned from a trip to an orphanage in war ravaged Mozambique. "It was a great opportunity to meet so many underprivileged people with very little chance in their lives" said Sonali Mgumba aged 7
Click to expand...

HAHAHAHAHA, these are awesome!
 
ImageUploadedByTapatalk1348928015.592921.jpg Does this go here? :p
 
A soldier was given the job of hunting for buffalo. To help him, he hired an Indian Scout. The two of them set off on their journey to find buffalo. After riding awhile, the Indian gets off his horse, puts his ear to the ground and says "Humm, buffalo come".
The soldier scans the area with his binoculars, but sees nothing. He is confused and says to the Indian, "I do not see anything, how do you know buffalo come?"
And the Indian replies, "Ear sticky".
 
Originally posted this in the 'You Laugh You Lose' thread. But it belongs here too.

Why does Michael J. Fox make the best milkshakes?
He uses the best ingredients.
 
Swearing

A 7 year old and a 4 year old are upstairs in their bedroom.

'You know what?' says the 7 year old, 'I think it's about time we started
swearing.'

The 4 year old nods his head in approval, so the 7 year old says, 'When we
go downstairs for breakfast I'm gonna swear first, then you swear after me,
ok?'

'Ok' the 4 year old, agrees with enthusiasm..

The mother walks into the kitchen and asks the 7 year old what he wants for
breakfast.

'Oh, shit mum, I don't know, I suppose I'll have some Coco Pops'

WHACK!! He flew out of his chair, tumbled across the kitchen floor, got up,
and ran upstairs crying his eyes out.

She looked at the 4 year old and asked with a stern voice, ' And what do YOU
want for breakfast, young man?'

'I don't know,' he blubbers, 'but it won't be f*cking Coco Pops'

 
Invisible Man goes to the doctor

Nurse says, wait here I will tell the doctor you are here.

Nurse goes into the doctors office and says, the invisible man is here

Doctor says, well tell him that I can't see him right now




Stolen from Nirvana.
 
Douglas Engelbart, the inventor of the computer mouse, has died.
What foresight he had, knowing that one day men would need to keep one hand free when using a computer.
 
You must log in or register to reply here.
Back
Top