Jokes Thread.
- Thread starter mattvincent
- Start date
thecat
NSWMTB, Central Tableland MBC
I took the wife to a club at the weekend. There was a guy on the
dance floor giving it everything he had; breakdancing, moonwalking, back
flips, the works.
My wife turned to me and said, " See that guy? 25 years ago he proposed to
me and I turned him down."
I said, "Looks like he's still fucking celebrating!!"
dance floor giving it everything he had; breakdancing, moonwalking, back
flips, the works.
My wife turned to me and said, " See that guy? 25 years ago he proposed to
me and I turned him down."
I said, "Looks like he's still fucking celebrating!!"
downhillar
Likes Dirt
HAHAHAHAHA, these are awesome!
danthebloke
Likes Dirt
Why did God invent thrush?
So women would know what its like to live with an irritating c$%t to.
So women would know what its like to live with an irritating c$%t to.
Art Vanderlay
Hourly daily
If you date a lady called 'Franny', don't call her Crunt
petedunn890
Squid
What's red and bad for your teeth?
A Brick
A Brick
The Duckmeister
Has a juicy midrange
What do you call a bogan in a wheelschair?
Sick mate!
What do you call a bogan in a coffin?
Fully sick mate!
Sick mate!
What do you call a bogan in a coffin?
Fully sick mate!
Broken Bones89
Likes Bikes and Dirt
A soldier was given the job of hunting for buffalo. To help him, he hired an Indian Scout. The two of them set off on their journey to find buffalo. After riding awhile, the Indian gets off his horse, puts his ear to the ground and says "Humm, buffalo come".
The soldier scans the area with his binoculars, but sees nothing. He is confused and says to the Indian, "I do not see anything, how do you know buffalo come?"
And the Indian replies, "Ear sticky".
The soldier scans the area with his binoculars, but sees nothing. He is confused and says to the Indian, "I do not see anything, how do you know buffalo come?"
And the Indian replies, "Ear sticky".
Knut
Troll hunter
Swearing
A 7 year old and a 4 year old are upstairs in their bedroom.
'You know what?' says the 7 year old, 'I think it's about time we started
swearing.'
The 4 year old nods his head in approval, so the 7 year old says, 'When we
go downstairs for breakfast I'm gonna swear first, then you swear after me,
ok?'
'Ok' the 4 year old, agrees with enthusiasm..
The mother walks into the kitchen and asks the 7 year old what he wants for
breakfast.
'Oh, shit mum, I don't know, I suppose I'll have some Coco Pops'
WHACK!! He flew out of his chair, tumbled across the kitchen floor, got up,
and ran upstairs crying his eyes out.
She looked at the 4 year old and asked with a stern voice, ' And what do YOU
want for breakfast, young man?'
'I don't know,' he blubbers, 'but it won't be f*cking Coco Pops'
A 7 year old and a 4 year old are upstairs in their bedroom.
'You know what?' says the 7 year old, 'I think it's about time we started
swearing.'
The 4 year old nods his head in approval, so the 7 year old says, 'When we
go downstairs for breakfast I'm gonna swear first, then you swear after me,
ok?'
'Ok' the 4 year old, agrees with enthusiasm..
The mother walks into the kitchen and asks the 7 year old what he wants for
breakfast.
'Oh, shit mum, I don't know, I suppose I'll have some Coco Pops'
WHACK!! He flew out of his chair, tumbled across the kitchen floor, got up,
and ran upstairs crying his eyes out.
She looked at the 4 year old and asked with a stern voice, ' And what do YOU
want for breakfast, young man?'
'I don't know,' he blubbers, 'but it won't be f*cking Coco Pops'
Browndog77
Likes Dirt
Invisible Man goes to the doctor
Nurse says, wait here I will tell the doctor you are here.
Nurse goes into the doctors office and says, the invisible man is here
Doctor says, well tell him that I can't see him right now
Stolen from Nirvana.
Nurse says, wait here I will tell the doctor you are here.
Nurse goes into the doctors office and says, the invisible man is here
Doctor says, well tell him that I can't see him right now
Stolen from Nirvana.
