PLUGGA
Likes Dirt
Hey dudes! *BIG REPLY ALERT!* Cool to see this thread has revived and people are still getting something out of it. So I thought I'd give an update. SHIT LOADS has happened in the years gone, and we now have a second kid, Nash, he just turned 2. Unfortunately I'm still battling with being a parent, though I'm neck deep in a good patch at the moment, so I'll take it. Turned out that all the behaviour issues I was/am struggling with was Autism and ADHD. What a nightmare it has been, for Ella in particular. For reasons I still cannot work out, I really struggle with some of the behaviour traits of ASD/ADHD, and have found it hard to move forward. I've developed what seems like a two second fuse, as a lot of the behaviour flies in the face of normal expectations. But I now completely understand that she cannot control her emotions and that she operates on a completely different level to neurotypical people, but it's really hard not to react when your daughter has your wife by the throat. Or when she lashes out and draws blood on my son. Ella is now 5 and has had 12 months of intense therapy. (Early intervention/speech/ot, etc) and I'm happy to say that she has come so far it's not funny. That, coupled with her age, has made life with autism a lot easier for her, and in turn, me. I'm still seeing my counselor monthly, but have really struggled with it all. Autism is life changing, for everyone. It turns EVERYTHING upside down. I can only imagine what it's like for Ella. My wife and i have hit rock bottom a number of times, but we're still here, and we're still fighting for our relationship. Like I mentioned, we're going well at the moment. I think the desperation of it all finally clicked that illusive button, and I feel as though I've turned a corner....or a slight dog leg. Not sure yet. Aaand, unfortunately, Nash is showing the same signs that Ella did. Fuck. Anyway, still in the fight, and still here for my kids. Hope this thread continues to help others, as it has for me. It was awesome reading back through all the replies. Good bunch of eggs here on RB. I might start an ASD thread (if I ever get the time) soon, I'm sure there's truckloads of people in here who are living the autism life. Thanks again for all the awesome advice. Cheers legends!